Month: September 2018

I finally found a decent long term job which I should have started after I graduated college. If only I had found this place after I graduated, but I lived in a different state then and things happened to delay me.

Dating is also not going really fast for me, either.  I’m not asking to be married right away.  I just want something steady.  I’ve known some people who got married in only three months of dating and knowing each other. I’ve known some people who have gotten engaged in 6 months.  Yet, I’m still here sitting patiently waiting wondering if it will ever go to the next step for me to just have it be a steady relationship.  It’s exhausting.  Sometimes I feel like giving up trying but I know one day I will get the relationship I want.  Great things take time.

I’m good at making friends, but I can never get someone to officially declare we are in a relationship.  I don’t want to rush things because I want a relationship to last and if we are meant for each other, we have eternity so I doesn’t need to be anything right now only just friends. Still, I see my other friends being able to say they’re actually in a relationship.

My life is going at a snail’s pace.  I wonder if I will ever get that Condo or house that I want.  I wonder if I will have that family I want.  I wonder a lot of things that seems to look impossible right now.

People always say how am I able to be by myself in my room.  I’ve learned not to depend on anyone for company as they sometimes get busy with life.  So, I always busy myself watching my DVDs or work on my projects to pass the time to not think about hanging out with people when they’re busy.

My mentors tell me I should date other guys if the person I want to date is not ready.  I don’t just date anyone to have any boyfriend. I date because I like a person and if I can’t find a person I like who likes me back who is ready, then I won’t date.  If I started dating someone else, then I would not be able to hang out with my friend anymore. I like hanging out, going to the gym with my friend.

Now is the time to focus on my work and savings.  If something is supposed to happen with my friend God will lead the way.  And if something isn’t supposed to happen with my friend, God will show me someone else to date.

I will not chase anyone.

I’m sick of all these preachy left wing celebrities. John Cusack and Sophia Bush went crazy. Knowing how John Cusack is in real life and what he thinks now makes me sad he ruined one of my favorite movies Hot Tub Time Machine. I can’t throw it away since I already bought. I’ll keep these movies and shows to support the non crazy celebrities.

Sophia Bush is arrogant. They say she’s grateful for her fans but I don’t feel it. It is kind of a good thing these celebrities went psycho. I don’t need to spend money on these ungrateful people while I’m struggling in California.